Monday 30 April 2012

Happiness is a hot tub!

Happiness today was being so pleased with myself (and yes, I confess, slightly smug) and relaxed after an enjoyable swimming lesson, that I totally forgot that I had scary looking goggle indentations on my face and was only sporting a swimming costume, and yet managed to enjoy chatting to an utter cutie in the hot tub.  Not exactly my natural environment - but perhaps it should be!
Roll on next Monday!

Tuesday 24 April 2012

Happiness is....making others happy

I have an amazing job.  Without disclosing too many details, I play a tiny part in helping some incredible organisations to achieve their goals and to improve the lives of countless people in the UK.  A day doesn't pass when I don't feel humbled by the stories I hear and feel honoured to be able to effect a small change. Perhaps the most enjoyable element for me, is calling a charity to convey the good news that they are to receive a grant towards their work.
Today was one of those days of sharing good news.  A very happy day.

Saturday 21 April 2012

Happiness Is.....Freedom

Happiness for me, on this springtime Saturday, is not having to be anywhere at any set time.  I can simply drift and amble as my mood takes me.  Utter bliss.
It is all too easy during the working week to get caught up in the constant, and tiring, scurrying from gym, to work, to appointments, to see friends, to bed - only to then repeat it again the next day.
Today I purposefully have not made any plans and the freedom this brings is, quite literally, liberating.  I only have to please myself and see where my wandering mind and feet lead me.
What is perhaps the most pleasing thing for me to realise, is that just six months ago, I would have felt anxious at the prospect of such a day and would be setting myself a list of tasks.  With hindsight, I realise that I was avoiding being left alone with my thoughts.  Bonkers as it sounds, I now take delight in that I am happy in my own company and can relax by watching the world pass by.
I may not be an OAP but I am enjoying having my own personal Freedom Pass.

Thursday 19 April 2012

Happiness is.....

Sometimes it's simply for tomorrow.

I've learnt that there are some days that the black clouds settle (and I'm sure we all have our own triggers that culminate in an ominous rumbling amongst our thoughts), and that is normal.   The trick perhaps is to learn that this is just a blip and that tomorrow the sun may well be winking at us at dawn and encouraging us to play.

Happiness, I'm sure, is in what tomorrow may bring, or the next day, or the one after that....

Monday 16 April 2012

Happiness is....

Achieving the impossible.  Challenging those concrete concepts we have of ourselves and realising that, with a little bit of effort, they are moveable with quite astonishing consequences.  The sense of satisfaction and, for me, giddy glee that can be had from learning something that involved a lot of nervous energy at times.  All these things can bring happiness.

For me, this bundle of emotions is captured within my swimming costume.  Yes really!  I'll keep this brief as I've referred to it in a previous post, but a few months ago I decided that the time had come to tackle a phobia that has featured largely in my life for 30 years - water.  It has been a long and nervous journey, but nine weeks ago I started a course of individual lessons with tiny baby-steps achieved each week.  I am still somewhat in shock, however this evening I managed my first ever swim - from entry to exit.  It may sound pedestrian but, for me, it is a huge breakthrough and one which gives me a sparkling sense of achievement but also of the possibilities of what I am yet to achieve.

Happiness can be found in the most surprising of places - I, for one, would never have dreamt that it would be found in a swimming pool and from challenging a long-held belief that I would never be able to confront a fear and achieve the seemingly impossible.

What would you like to tackle to see if it brings a sense of satisfaction and happiness?  Go for it, you never know where it may take you.

Saturday 14 April 2012

Happiness is........

Waking up at the usual time and stretching in the luxurious, glorious knowledge that it is the weekend and I don't have to undertake the usual, crazed routine:
leap out of bed into the awaiting lycra; dash to gym; 40 minute heart-thumping, sweat-inducing exercise; run home; crash into the shower; 35 minutes to make agonising wardrobe decisions, grab fruit and run to the train station; play sardines for an hour on public transport and hope to arrive in the office before 9am.  Phew.
But not today.  Today I can just lie, nestled in the warmth of my duvet and let my thoughts meander and float.  Today I can rejoice in the utter silence as London has yet to start to creak into action.
Happiness for me has been to learn to be still.  That there is no guilt to be had in taking my foot off the accelerator whenever the opportunity arises.
Happiness is to relax.

Monday 9 April 2012

My Happiness Project - Easter Weekend

Happiness is......contagious!  Or so I am starting to think given my experiences this weekend.  Just as watching someone yawn seems to induce the same jaw-gaping reflex in oneself, so it would appear that laughing can cause a chain reaction that can be addictive.

Scenario 1 - Saturday afternoon, sat in a beauty salon treating myself to a gel manicure (happiness can also be created by little luxuries I've decided), one joke with the staff ended in an hour of non-stop laughter with three of us gasping for breath.  Yes, my nails may be slightly less than perfect as a result, but quite frankly, it was worth every moment and we had the whole salon smiling on a grim afternoon.

Scenario 2 - Saturday evening, I left the salon and went straight to a wine bar where I met a lovely friend and, later, his partner for dinner.  I don't know if it was because I was already buzzing with bonhomie, but the three of us have never had such an uproariously funny evening together, swapping stories (not all of them clean, sadly my doing!) and all of us commenting that we couldn't remember the last time each of us had enjoyed so many belly laughs.

Scenario 3 - Sunday I awoke in a good mood and, so deeply hooked by the laughter buzz, thought through my day ahead and which events may afford the most likely chortle opportunities.  Tea with a friend was just the ticket and I'm delighted to know that I provided a little light-relief in her stressful weekend.

In the words of the 1920s musical comedy producer Vivian Ellis, perhaps it really is possible to 'spread a little happiness'.  Admittedly he did have a fatal fever of 103F when he wrote this, but I shall skip over this point.  He may have been delirious but he hit the nail on the head!

Friday 6 April 2012

My Happiness Project - Days 9-12

This evening is my first at home in what has been a crazily busy week, so my first opportunity to reflect and return to my blog - not for long as I confess to being utterly exhausted so this is somewhat of a happiness round-up:

  • being carried away by live music performed by an artist with a voice that makes one's heart pound and transcends one to a place of utter joy.  How can one not stop smiling (and singing) to the happy lyrics 'the dark days are over'?  (Tuesday - Florence & The Machine live, watched from the privilege of a private box).
  • being still.  Our lives can become so frenetic with commuting, deadlines, being constantly on the go, I found it such a relief to spend a whole day working at my own pace, in my own flat for one, precious day (Wednesday, at home waiting for the gas man - who was rather cute - another happy moment!).
  • being valued.  I'm aware that this says a huge amount about my ego, but this week I had an insight into what makes me happy and which is lacking a wee bit in my current role.  Giving my advice, joining up the dots, crafting a solution to help an organisation achieve their goals (Wednesday, telephone call).
  • being a friend. This week I have been able to catch up and spend time with some lovely ladies that I have not seen for quite some time. We have laughed, hugged, shared fears, swapped stories and taken the time to reconnect (Wednesday, Thursday & Friday).
Today's quote from the original Happiness Project was "If one thinks that one is happy, that is enough to be happy." And so I shall not dwell on the dark clouds that have been lurking and, at times, threatened to take over. We can choose happiness or we can choose darkness.  It really is in our own hands.

Monday 2 April 2012

My Happiness Project - Day 8

Happiness is a curious catch-all word that we use to cover an utter plethora of emotions: from a gentle contentment to manic joy; from a quite inner-smile to a cheshire-cat-wide grin; from a quiet buzz to zinging elation.  Now that I am allowing the good times in, I have started to feel the enormous range of the happiness spectrum.  Yes, I know, it's taken me 37 years but, hey, better late than never right?

'Happiness' does not quite describe this evening's emotions.  Nervous energy with a side-order of astonishment, topped with a sprinkling of elation starts to move towards the mark.  I tend to think of myself as a bit of a scaredy-cat - until it was recently suggested to me that I had come out surviving from divorce, redundancy and a few other bits of nonsense over the years.  I am not quite certain how I arrived at wanting to tackle a life-long phobia of water after an incident that happened to me as a child, leaving me waking in cold sweats from  nightmares of swimming pools, but I have a suspicion that feeling generally more content and less-stressed was a major contributor.

So, to cut a long-story very short.  Eight weeks ago I faced swimming lesson number one.  Bearing in mind that I stop breathing if the jet from a shower hits my chest when I'm not expecting it, it was no surprise that I was in tears in the pool changing room.  Just eight lessons later, this evening I managed my first ever unassisted swim.  It wasn't for long and is the kind of thing my seven-year old nephew nailed a couple of years ago, but the sheer elation and happiness I felt in achieving something I never thought possible is enormous.

Happiness obviously ranges from the quiet, content moments such as the perfectly brewed cup of tea, to the brimming elation of pushing oneself way beyond one's comfort zone and feeling smugly proud.

Perhaps the most wonderful thing however is that this broad spectrum does exist.  So that everyday can contain a glimmer of happiness - if only we are open to recognising it.

So, end of lesson eight - first swim.  Next stop - team GB?!

Sunday 1 April 2012

My Happiness Project - Day 7

As is the case with most people, I have a somewhat varied range of experiences and emotions when it comes to my immediate family.  One element however which, on the whole, continues to grow and provide a sense of happiness and well being, is my relationship with my two sisters.

With distant parents, and especially since I have been single, my sisters have steadily become my family.  It is hard to define a sibling relationship - friendship definitely, but also something intangible, a certain sense of belonging and simply being at ease and slotting in.  There is something strangely comforting about spending time with someone you love and in who's face you see your own characteristics and elements of your own visage mirrored.  

Having spent a few hours hunting the Faberge eggs along the south bank with two very testing nephews, we managed to snatch a lovely half an hour in the gorgeous afternoon sunshine whilst her boys kept themselves amused.  We shared worries, joys and, as with most Wilkinson occasions, copious amounts of tea.  I watched her beautiful face and felt a smile from deep within.

Happiness, perhaps most keenly felt when one lives alone, is being connected with those one loves.  Today, for me, happiness was a simple day with my sister.  

Happy Sunday.